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Question:
I've been married for the last 10 yrs. Our marriage was great and our sex lives were great also. But the last 4 yrs it’s all going down hill. I love my husband we had an open relationship, which was great. I always had orgasms by myself. I would come in
public. But, one thing I cannot do is please myself. I don't now what's wrong
with me anymore. I used to have lots of fun and loved to have sex and I loved to
show my body off. Can you please give me some advise of what's happening to
me or tell me what I can do? I feel like I'm loosing everything. I gained
weight but I’m trying to loose that but that still does not help me. Thank
you for listening.
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Answer:
by Annette Owens: (05/31/2004)
You two could probably benefit from seeing a sex therapist. You can contact The American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) at www.aasect.org in order to find a professional in your local area.
Many factors may be contributing to why you no longer find sex as fun as before. Your body image may have something to do with it, and you are already addressing that issue by trying to lose weight. What else has changed in your life? Do you still practice an open relationship? Do you find your husband attractive? Is sex boring? There are many ways to bring back the spark, but it all depends on your specific situation. It is very important to communicate openly with your partner about what is going on, what is bothering you, what may be bothering him, and what you two think you can do about it.
I am afraid that I cannot be of much more help at this time. A counselor could probably be of great help to you and bring you on the right track.
Good luck,
Annette Owen, MD PhD
Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team
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