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Question:
My labia hangs down 6cm I feel uncomfortable, my boyfriend wants to have sex with me but i wont because i am too embarassed about my labia being so big, am i abnormal? I really need to hear from you as i am too embarassed to ask or tell anyone about it, I am 18 and still a virgin.

Answer:
by Susan Ludwig: (06/25/2004)
I am really glad you wrote to ask about this very important question. I think the most frequent question I hear when I am seeing young women in clinic is "does this look normal to you?" One of the reasons is that women never have a chance to see other women's labia!! And if they look in magazines that display women's labia -- they see something that has been carefully arranged to look "normal." The problem is that "normal" often looks more like a plucked chicken than like a typical labia when portrayed in a magazine! I would like to make a suggestion to you about how you might resolve this issue. I would like you to consider going to your local birth control clinic and talking to a counsellor about your decision to become sexually active. She can help you sort out your feelings about the appearance of your labia -- AND if you decide to become more intimate with your boyfriend you can chose a method of birth control and/or STD protection that is best for both of you. You don't have to have a physical examination on your first visit -- and the counsellor can help to prepare you for what you can expect when you have an examination later on. You can also look at books (found in any feminist bookstore) about the appearance of labia! You will find that their appearance is as diverse as is the appearance of different people's faces! I think that a physical assessment (when you feel ready) will be reassuring to you. It will tell you that you look perfectly "normal" -- and will reassure you that you are healthy as well!! I wish you well and hope that you will let us know how you do!! There are many other young women who are afraid that they are somehow "abnormal" and they might find courage in learning that you were able to take steps to reassure yourself that you are perfectly "normal!" Thank you again for writing to us at sexualhealth.com!

Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team

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