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Question:
When I meet new people, there is the presumption that "people in wheelchairs don't do sex." How do I communicate my interests without getting busted for harassment?

Answer:
by Mitchell Tepper:
(05/15/2004)
As long as the person you are expressing your desires to is not a child, employee, student or another person you have power over, your frankness is not likely to lead to sexual harassment charges. But if you equate rejection with self-worth, there may be emotional consequences. Stereotypically we are seen as asexual, childlike and helpless. We may be perceived as either "safe," needing to be taken care of or as someone who can easily be controlled. None of these stereotypes places us on an equal footing for a sexual partnership. If your partner sees you in any of these ways, then you're faced with a choice between moving on, accepting a relationship based on their faulty perceptions, or indicating more clearly that you are interested in a relationship that includes sex. Moving on may be painful but, in the long-run, healthier than spending all your emotional energy on trying to change someone else. But first, you should be sure you have openly and honestly communicated your interests. Mitch Tepper

Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team

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