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Question:
hi sir... i m a 20 year old boy ...i dont have any bad habbits like smoking or drinking...i have no problme in erections ..they are normal..but i dont know how to masturbate...never tried much ofr it...cant concentrate long while masturbating...so give up finaly ..i m from india..and dont have proper conditions for masturbating....instead i get wet dreams..is it a problem at this age..should i have masturbated uptil now????i m feared how i will do sex where i have never masturbated..not masturbating is a problem???do reply sir thanx

Answer:
by Konstance McCaffree: ()
You can be proud of yourself that you don't have any of the negative habits that can injure your health. You also don't have to worry that you need to know how to masturbate to have sex. Self pleasuring is very different than having intercourse with someone else. The other person's body and your attraction to that person can be very stimulating where as in masturbation you need to create the stimulation yourself. Many people suggest that people learn to masturbate so they understand how their own body works and so you can feel when there is about to be an orgasm but it is not something you have to do, or that all men and women do. Getting wet dreams is a very natural bodily response at your age, and something you may have for several years more. Not all men have wet dreams but some do and some do even when they are masturbating or having intercourse. There is no reason you need to have masturbated until now, or at any age at all. If you want to masturbate because you can gain pleasure from it, then you will need to find a private place (as you mentioned there are not propoer conditions which I assume to be privacy)because other wise you will be very distracted worrying about getting caught. You also probably need to create a fantasy that will excite you and that you can use to touch yourself. You can touch your genitals in any number of ways, such as rubbing against a pillow or watching a sexy movie and pretending a partner is stroking you when you are actually stroking yourself, but these are only ways that some people use. There is no reason that you need to masturbate unless you feel comfortable doing so.

Reviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology

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