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Question:
I have been sexually active for a few years, and right from the beginning i have been ejaculating very quickly, some times after only a few seconds. My girlfriends made the commit that I may be coming quick because i masturbate alot and maybe my body was used to coming(almost daily). Could this be the case? Are there alot(or any) side effects to masturbating? And is there any advise you can give to help me prolong sex? I have also noticed that I have the urge to masturbate daily now, and find it difficult not to.
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Answer:
by Konstance McCaffree: ()
Yours is such a common issue for so many males. Quick ejaculation is the number one complaint that most males have about their sexual responses.
That means that this isn't unusual - so you need not feel badly.
Also, masturbation is actually the way most people suggest that fast ejaculation can be worked with. If you go ahead and ejaculate quickly and then begin sexual arousal and pleasuring with your partner again, the second time will be even slower.
I hesitate to tell you the above information though because it sounds to me as if there are other pressures you are feeling that only enhance your fast ejaculations.
It can be a self-fulfilling prophesy. You think you are going to have a fast ejaculation and then you do! If you didn't worry about it, let it happen and in fact enouraged your partner to be involved in it, then continued on with lots of play and sexual arousal you may find the pressure not so great.
There is nothing about masturbating daily that makes you a fast ejaculator unless your masturbation time is fast and you have conditioned your response to be fast. If you slow down and let your masturbation take time, you can also learn to control your body more. You can begin to pay attention to the cues that suggest that you are about to have an orgasm, and then either squeeze the base of the penis to stop it or to slow down the stimulation. You can then do this with a partner.
Masturbation is a wonderful way to release sexual tensions and isn't likely to get in the way of enjoying a sexual relationship with a partner, which actually is a very different sex act and may be putting pressure on you. Try different things, like laying on your back during sex instead of on top of a pertner, to take even more pressure off. Have your partner sit on top and stimulate you from there. YOu may find that things slow down a little.
I hope this helps. Thanks for the question.Reviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology
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