Register to join our community
|
|
Question:
I will try to make this brief, I am happily maried and love my wife very much, we have a healthy sex life from what I can tell. Although I am always horny and have been that way for as long as I can remember, I have masturbated probably at least twice a day for the past 16 years sometimes more than twice a day. I love women and everything about them. The way they look smell and taste. But I also have thoughts about men. I even masturbate thinking about them, (and have cyber sex with them on line from time to time) I am not interested in meeting anyone inperson just the thought of gay sex is an extreme turn on for me. Does this imply I am gay, bi or just overly curious.
|
Answer:
by Blaise Parker: ()
Hi,
I apologize that it took me so long to answer your question, I've been very busy as of late! :)
In regards to your question about sexual orientation, I think we can safely say you are not gay, as you seem to have a happy and healthy sex life with your wife. You may be bisexual, but more likely you are just excited by the thoughts or fantasy of men having sex with men, since you say you are not interested in seeking this out.
I find that the best way to think about GLB issues is to distinguish between a gay/lesbian/bisexual identity (which is someone who has come out and is comfortable calling him/herself GLB), same-gender attraction or fantasies (which may be what you are experiencing in your fantasies and cybersex), and same-gender experience (which could be experimentation, situational, etc.).
People want to believe that all three of these variables should always match up, but sometimes straight men fantasize about gay sex, sometimes lesbians have sex with men, and so on. There are a million ways one's sexual unfolding can play out, and fantasy and experience don't always lead to a particular sexual orientation or identity.
Hope that answers your question!
BlaiseReviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology
|
This question appears in the following topics:
|
|
|
|
